75 Milton
I never noticed how actually insane my local bus is until these last two months when my sisters car has been out of action and we have been using public transport.
It's never quite the same. And depending on time of day, The inward journey can be very different to the outward. But one thing you can guarantee — it is going to be mental.From those comutters in the morning dashTo the daytime school runs, reeking o hash.The harmless wee guy, that's always drunk,Those in plain sight, dealing their skunkThe coloured wumin, that sits on her phoneTalking to someone, until she gets home.Her beautiful weans left staring at faces,Of strangers all going to different places.The boy that gets on who used to get highTrying his best now, just to get by,Money to spare, but lacking in wealth,Battling daily, with his mental health.The one's that get on, as loud as hellAnd those who constantly ring on the bellThe driver who waits when he sees someone run,And the ones who pull off, just for the fun.Pensioners out for their weekly shop, Seem to get on at every stop.The bus pulls of, they swagger and swayIf the driver is nice, he makes sure he waits. The last thing he wants is them making a fuss, Especially if they were to fall on his bus. And that, let me tell you, is the quietest route Because on the way back, you can be sure it's a hoot. I've seen dating, and mating, and phone numbers been passed, Old fellas that's swallied, young lassies harrassed. The voices are loud, the bus is a din, I pity the driver, wouldnae like to be himThe more insane it can be depends on the time, Sometimes your just lucky, and everyones fine.Sometimes it starts at the bus stop, and you can just tell —This journey home, is going to be hell.The timetable says there's a 75 due,Then it's done a Paul Daniels, and disappeared noo.There's jakeys and drunks awe starting to talkIf only I could, I'd be tempted to walk.This one that's talking, he said his names Keith,He smiled at me, and I seen he'd nae teeth,They were hurting his gums, and giving him pain,So he decided, he'd leave them at hame.And now he's asking if I want to dance — If he looked like George Clooney, he'd be in wae a chance.I smiled politely, "I do not want to jive"And saved by the bell —Here's the 75.